I remember the world felt young
As if anything could happen, anything be done
And when I thought of who I’d become
I didn’t see these years, I didn’t feel this numb
You’ve got a fighter, a fighter on your hands
And those wars that made me what I am
are still in play
I survived those dark hours and I’ll carry on today
Image by PolarityFlow from Pixabay
Burn this candle late at night,
when you see no hope in sight.
When the lights have gone out
and all that’s left is doubt,
burn this candle to give you light.
And don’t give up without a fight.
Even when the world seems dim,
live your life upon a whim.
Dare to be all that you can.
Then, look and see how you’ve ran.
You will see you’ve gone the distance
because you didn’t lose your resistance.
For one little glimmer of light
burned for you on your darkest night.
Burn this candle to rekindle your life.
ACR circa 2002
Image by Tapani Hellman from Pixabay
My children laugh and play
I hope they have joy as the day fades
I made myself forget my yesterdays
but sometimes the pain returns,
takes my breath away
it makes a fear that won’t go away
Standing on the edge of the blade
I’m already cut
I already bleed
All of the life leaving me
But I still I go on,
I go on
I made myself forget my yesterdays
but sometimes the pain returns,
wound so tight I can barely breathe
still I go on
I’ve got this fire in me, I can’t see for the flames.
Do you see me burning?
I’m burnt out, holding the shame.
The problem with discerning
is that once you know, you know what you know.
You carry their burden, letting it burn you down.
Maybe I’m a phoenix, if only I could rise.
Rise above, rise above my life.
I’m afraid to make a sound; I’m afraid to fight —
the poster child for a locked-up life.
Carrying the burden while I’m burning down.
breathe in, breathe in, breathe in, breathe out
find the focal point
Dawn draws near, I can feel it now.
Image by Andreas Samuelsson from PixabayI
this is what I wear when I want to remember you
people passing don’t know that I’m a time traveler
today is a a one-way trip from yesterday to tomorrow
I saw the change when you looked at me that way
your hands on my shoulders
your arm pulling me closer
your eyes meeting mine
if only I could have said your name
maybe someday I’ll let you find me again
but not today
Holding tight to what I can’t say,
waiting for Time to steal it away.
A drink, a run, bury the thoughts,
find a way to survive another day.
Let me forget to feel the pain,
it’s better to let it slip away.
What keeps me here?
What keeps me here?
I’m holding all the words I wish I could say
to let you see, to let you stay…
Keeping you at a distance so
I don’t give it away.
But you’re still here.
And I’m still here.
Oh, why do we stay?
Why do I stay?
Holding tight to what I can’t say,
waiting for Time to steal it away.
Cold silence.
Passion in hiding.
I know I’ve known you but I don’t understand where you’ve been.
It’s as if I have to be cold to know who I am.
I don’t want to hurt you but you’ll have frostbite if you stay here.
Find a fireplace by which to warm your hands
and stay away from this arctic air.
With you, I can’t find the order, the system is frozen.
A unique story told imperfectly is more appealing than a formulaic one done well.
There’s charm to the predictability, but does it take us anywhere?
At this precipice, I find myself here on the lonely, breaking end of missing you.
I can’t take these waves of imperfection in me —
cast aside the process — I know you’re there, I can’t help but to reach for you.
Skyless memories remind me of why I left myself behind.
At this precipice again, I find myself here on the lonely, breaking end of missing you.
As if in dreams we speak, our eyes meet and you’re all I see.
Yet at the urge to leap, I turn and run.
I try to find the meaning, cry out “let this be done!”
I’ve looked everywhere except at the truth.
What I seek can’t be found in you when all I need is already in me.
choking on words we can’t speak
holding back whispers ’til we can’t breathe
no silhouette, no black and white
confusion comes when there’s no day or night
how can we live trapped in the gray
forever lost, forever in wait
in-between hearts locked away
toss it to the stars
you don’t have to fall apart
let a new day come
a new day
notthestateofmyhouse 