The Gift

I wish I knew exactly what to give to you.

I’ve loved you for years but there’s so much more to you than I’ve seen.

I’m in too deep if I can’t see the forest because of the trees.

I have only my heart spilling ink on the page.

When all that we have turns to dust anyway, let me love your pain away.

Let me hold your aching soul.

If I’m going to lose myself, let it be to something worthy.

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Winter

Cold silence.

Passion in hiding.

I know I’ve known you but I don’t understand where you’ve been.

It’s as if I have to be cold to know who I am.

I don’t want to hurt you but you’ll have frostbite if you stay here.

Find a fireplace by which to warm your hands

and stay away from this arctic air.

With you, I can’t find the order, the system is frozen.

Lone Wolf Defined

the trouble is you think I’m predictable

but what you’ll find that you know is nothing about me

I’ve never understood the draw of the rhyme

Just another way to color between the lines.

Does it mean that that I’m subpar, do I really belong to humankind?

I don’t know but that’s not how I flow.

I’m a little bit abstract and sometimes, maybe I’m a little absent.

Make an impression. Show me Monet.

Take my hand and dance to Samain night.

Leave behind what can be defined.

It’s too cold for you here

Snowfall on tree tops. My heart beats and then stops.

I was looking for my twin flame so maybe I’m the one to blame.

Maybe you can’t save me or I’m not the one who needs saving.

If you are my downfall but I’m your redemption, how do we decide, who makes the call?

I don’t want to fall in love — be entangled in all of

the ways — get lost in the things that send me astray.

Baby, baby take me there. Maybe if I get lost you won’t find me near.

If I do this for you, would you accept what you always knew?

I don’t love you. I don’t want to.

I’m sorry for every time I was right, every time I got what I expected from life.

It’s too cold for you here. It’s time to move on my dear.

Breaking End

At this precipice, I find myself here on the lonely, breaking end of missing you.

I can’t take these waves of imperfection in me —

cast aside the process — I know you’re there, I can’t help but to reach for you.

 

Skyless memories remind me of why I left myself behind.

At this precipice again, I find myself here on the lonely, breaking end of missing you.

As if in dreams we speak, our eyes meet and you’re all I see.

 

Yet at the urge to leap, I turn and run.

I try to find the meaning, cry out “let this be done!”

I’ve looked everywhere except at the truth.

What I seek can’t be found in you when all I need is already in me.

Stardust and Sinew

We’re made of spirit and stardust,

wonder bound up in bone and sinew.

Looking and longing for a reflection

of an unknown truth.

I’d rather be lonely than strand you beside me…

Yet still I ache for your voice, your laughter, your eyes.

I know — I know better but it’s like you’re inside me,

as if you know every destination and there you stand waiting.

There I see my reflection but an endless me is not what I should be reflecting.

My heart forgets the truth of me, forgets the truth in all this debating.

The cosmos flow inside my veins, yet still I don’t feel the power I contain.

 

in-between

choking on words we can’t speak

holding back whispers ’til we can’t breathe

no silhouette, no black and white

confusion comes when there’s no day or night

how can we live trapped in the gray

forever lost, forever in wait

in-between hearts locked away

 

toss it to the stars

you don’t have to fall apart

let a new day come

a new day

Velocity

How can I leave, just leave things this way?

How, how do I stay when there are so many words I can’t say?

So many questions when I don’t know any answers.

I’m looking for something. Could it be here?

My soul is restless; how can I stay?

I have nothing to give you because I’ve given it away.

I try to round this out, but I’m left holding squares.

It doesn’t fit. It doesn’t make sense but here I am.